Thursday, April 28, 2011

Life Lessons from Disney

Rafiki: What was that? The weather-Pbbbah! Very peculiar. Don't you think?

Simba: Yeah. Looks like the winds are changing.

Rafiki: Ahhh. Change is good.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Rafiki: Oh yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it. . .or learn from it.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011


I redesigned my blog today! You know you love it.

Yaaaaay, colors! I actually don't mind the pink in this one--the orange downplays it enough that I'm not cringing at the sight.

And it has lime green. I have much love for lime green.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Growing a Spine

I'm told that I care too much on a regular basis by a good friend of mine. He's right. I do.

So this is me, deciding to care a bit less what other people think. I'm always worried that someone will misunderstand me, or get something out of what I write or say that wasn't my intention. But no more. From now on, I will write whatever I want (I've sort of been doing that one already), and if anyone has a problem, then they can post a comment or come talk to me about it.

If they choose not to say anything, then they should also choose to forfeit their complaints about what I've written. "Speak now or forever hold your peace."

On this blog, I will never write about specific people or specific events. I write about issues in my life in a general sense. I do this to protect the people I have come in contact with. I have tried to protect them to the point where I have been unable to write anything. I care too much.

Because this is an online medium, I care about protecting the people in my life--even those I dislike. But I will not let my inspiration be crippled by my over-caring nature. So I choose to write what I feel while protecting the innocent (and not-so innocent). And I won't feel guilty about that, either.

"Like 90210 without the Beverly Hills"

I'm done with this college town, with its juvenile drama. Honestly, you'd think that kids would have learned to talk through their issues by the time they hit college, but time after time again I've found that isn't the case here. Maybe it's that we're not maturing as quick as we used to, but whatever the reason, I can't stand it anymore. I'm ready to be treated like an adult, not an unruly high schooler. College kids and their drama.

But whatever the reason, I'm tired of having to deal with other people's issues. I'm tired of having their problems of past neglect or trauma become my problems. I have my own baggage, but at least I acknowledge that it's there and work towards getting rid of it. Most of the girls I've had issues with--guys haven't really given me that much trouble--haven't done that, at least not out loud. (I am not counting the times girls have tearfully and emphatically stated that they were horrible people in an attempt to gain sympathy. Those times definitely don't count. Sad to say, that's happened with several of the girls I used to know...) They appeared to be in a state of denial, and that never works out well for anyone.

When faced with those types of people, I have always run. Always. Why? Dude, those gals were poisonous. No matter what I did, it was wrong. I could do no right, they always found fault. They were unhappy with themselves, and so they made me miserable too. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't fix it. So I gave up, endured, and as soon as I could be rid of them, I was.

Even though I've lost those relationships, I think I'm better for the loss. Hurting people hurt people. Until you deal with your baggage, you will always hurt those around you, damage your friendships, and run off those that you love. It's a constant process, dealing with baggage. But if I can do it, so can you. Now I can maintain healthy relationships with people--providing that those people aren't poisonous themselves. It's definitely worth the effort, pain, and hours of self-reflection.

Letting Others Speak

I recently let someone else speak for me. I intend to do the same again, because I'm sure you would rather not listen to me all the time. Finding other people who share my viewpoints validates my beliefs and opinions and strengthens what I say. When I say that I agree with something, that choice becomes part of who I am.

I agree with this article here about pretty much everything it says, particularly the bit about the signs of a a narrow-minded, selfish friend. Trust me on this one, once you figure out that a person is this way you've got to cut and run. They'll only burn you out otherwise.

On a happy note: Easter was fabulous, my family is amazing, and I can't wait until I can go home for the summer.

Monday, April 11, 2011

How I feel about yelling.

This time I'm not going to say anything. I'm going to let someone else talk for a change.

This guy here says pretty much everything I'd want to say on this topic. Watch and enjoy--and hopefully learn something, or realize something you hadn't realized before.

Note: I do not endorse this man's opinions about other topics, particularly those regarding religion. I do, however, fully endorse his opinion on this topic.

Saturday, April 9, 2011


Have you ever noticed that Facebook is nothing more than glorified stalking?

Or that high school drama can be magnified to a larger scale? For instance,

"OMG, Johnny went out with Kelly last night. I totally hate her now! She is so not my friend anymore."

So then Kelly gets hurt, and wonders what in the world happened.

This happened to my brother not long ago, and it has happened very recently to another friend of mine (though that situation is different).

I'm going to stick my neck out and say that if you delete someone you know in real life and see on a regular basis, you should probably tell them what's up. Why? Because they won't know otherwise. Deleting them on Facebook is a passive-aggressive act that is uncalled for and very immature.

Communication is key. If that person is not spoken to and an explanation is not given, then that person will have no idea what on earth they've done to upset you. People are not mind readers. You have to tell us what's on your mind.

Also, if the deleting was for something trivial and petty, then shame on you.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Daydreaming about Dreaming

I hate losing control. I fear my own anger, what it provokes me to do and say. I hate trust falls--as a former camper and camp counselor, I've had to fall off a platform several times. Luckily, my fellow campers/staffers have always had my back, and I've never fallen. But that moment where my feet fall away from the floor is the most terrified I ever am. The world is falling away, I'm falling, and I just know I'm going to splat against the ground. But then I never do. But even knowing I'll be fine, I still fear falling and trust exercises. The loss of control is terrifying.

But for someone who fears losing control (though usually I have nothing to worry about in that department), I love dreaming. When we sleep, we lose control of our bodies as well as our thoughts. We completely surrender to our need for rest, and in return for our surrender and weakness, we get dreams. I am usually blessed with strange, chaotic, beautiful, and sometimes frightening dreams. Very rarely do I have any direction in my dreams, but I am usually feeling and seeing whatever is happening. And it is wonderful. Why? It's like living a fairytale story.

In my dreams, I can breathe underwater, fly, run a million miles, or do anything I want. Even sprout feathers. That happened once. I was very bewildered when I woke up. (I thought it was hilarious, though.) I think it is because of my dreams--the sleeping kind, not my lofty goals for my future--that allows me to still see the creativity and beauty of the world. My dreams soften my heart and take me back to when I was a kid again, back when sprouting feathers was something that could actually maybe happen. (I spent a good portion of my childhood wishing I could get my owl from Hogwarts and then become an Animagus.)

The point is, to get those glorious dreams, I have to give up my precious control. Control of self is the only control I have--I'm not the type to knowingly manipulate others to get what I want, or try to control events or other people's lives. Oddly enough, it is usually me being manipulated and controlled for the benefit of others.

As for why my dreams are full of nonsense, I really have no idea. It could be a product of my fantasy literature collection, my own very unique subconscious, or it could be that God sends the dreams. Regardless of which it is, I love my dreams, and I don't mind that I have to give up control to get them.

Now if only I could figure out how to not mind falling so much...

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Verse of the Day

This is one of my personal favorites.

Luke 8:17 "For all that is secret will eventually be brought into the open, and everything that is concealed will be brought to light and made known to all."

This means exactly what it says. You can't keep something secret. Eventually, people will know about it. Now, if it's a good secret, like a surprise birthday party, that might not be so bad. But if it's not, and you're doing something wrong, or something that you know will hurt someone else if they found out...

Well, secrets will out. And ultimately, no matter the type of secret, in the end it will be the secret-keeper who faces the consequences. The moral of the story? Don't sneak around, or do shady stuff. It never ends well, people will find out, and if they decide to put you to the coals?

There's no defending that sort of thing. Not really.